How can a word so simple carry such complex meaning for a boy like me. I used to think honesty was what we studied in school; telling the truth. And it’s not even that deep, there’s just honest people and dishonest people. Again, not that deep. But just like how you gain depth with other areas in life (through experience), I have learnt to see honesty in totally different context. Spoiler: I never want to be associated with dishonesty, or a dishonest person.
Etymology of honesty
You would be surprised of the evolution of this word. Stemming from Latin, it used to mean living a life that is respectable to others. It used to mean dignity and honor. It then evolved to Middle English and later to English meaning moral purity, truthfulness and authenticity. If you ask me, all these words point to a similar path of living. My favorite definition is the one describing honesty as authenticity.
All this for what, Suleiman?
My world recently collided with a dishonest person. The thing about dishonesty is I believe our bodies are wired to detect it. Call it intuition. Something inside will tell you that something is not adding up, and especially when you are dealing with people you truly know. Always take note of that inner guide. Maybe do not act on it immediately, but place a mental note, open a mental tab, mark as unread, etc etc. Eventually truth always comes out. Something I love to say is rotten fruit always falls off on its own.
Once that truth comes out, honesty dictates that you have to live in harmony with it. Fighting with truth will get you nowhere good. It will get you nothing good. You may think you defeated truth, but certain things in life are not up for contention, neither are they up for debate. You either shape up to truth, or truth ships you out.
Why am I so passionate about this topic? I love that question.
Why the passion
Remember when I told you I recently had my world collide with a dishonest person? Also remember when I told you dishonesty hurts most when it comes from someone you know and, probably love. That’s my story. I was lied to by a familiar face. One I trusted to always be honest with me. And when you are honest yourself, you never really see it coming. The missile of dishonesty. Nonetheless your eyes are opened and it dawns on you. The next step is often the scary bit. Tough on your soul.
Now what.
To forgive or not to forgive.
That is the million dollar question.
Forgiving will always serve the person who is forgiving. Yes, until the mistake (in this case, dishonesty) is repeated.
Then you are left doubting why you forgave in the first place.
Or better yet, whether you should forgive again.
So what happens this time around?
This time around
For me, this time around, I choose not to forgive again. Honesty, especially in adults, is a conscious choice. Anyone not choosing it, is doing so deliberately. And plus: fool me one time, shame on you; fool me two times, shame on me; fool me three times and we duck the peace sign and let it rain on you. To prevent the third bit, let’s leave it all at the second.
Choose honesty today. Honesty is the quiet foundation of trust, shaping how we relate to others and to ourselves. It calls for transparency, sincerity, and the courage to align our words with our actions. In a world full of noise, choosing honesty builds credibility, strengthens relationships, and fosters lasting integrity in both personal and professional life.
